May 2, 2018

Why I Will Never Ask If You're Planning to Have Children.


I want this blog to be a fun, uplifting place, with cute crafts and dreamy photographs. (who doesn’t?) 
I also want it to be real, though. And something is heavy on my heart right now. Okay, it’s actually been heavy on my heart for quite sometime, but today I’m pouring it all out in hopes that it will help me heal a little (and maybe it will help someone else, too).

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We’ve gotten the questions for quite awhile now, “Are you guys going to have more kids?” “When are you guys going to add to your family?” “Doesn’t he want to carry on his legacy?” etc., and the questions have only increased since we’ve been engaged/married.

They’re well meaning, I know, but that doesn’t mean they’re any less hurtful and intrusive. Because the truth is, we probably won’t have kids, and I’m still processing that. Every time the subject is brought up though, the scab is ripped off my wound that is desperately trying to heal itself. Every time that we have to answer “no, probably not”, the subject gets rehashed between the two of us. Every time someone says, “he will change his mind”, I feel resentful again. Every time someone says, “but she’s still so young, you should really give her one”, he braces himself for the bad mood of mine that he knows is coming.

It is hard, you guys. A serious. mental. mind. screw. And we’re actually tremendously blessed, because physically, we probably could have children if we wanted to. Our decision is based on other, personal, factors that the whole world doesn’t need to be privy to.
I cannot imagine how much worse it would feel to a couple trying to have a baby. I cannot fathom the pit in her stomach when she politely says, for the 123rd time, “maybe someday” instead of explaining how she’s already lost three. I cannot imagine the amount of tears that follow when people make comments about the clock ticking down, because she knows her clock broken. & I cannot imagine the anger that flows through her when people say, “well you know how to make that happen, right?” when she answers their “are you pregnant?” with, “I wish”.

Everyone is different. Maybe they can’t have kids. Maybe they don’t want kids ever. Maybe they don’t want kids for now. Maybe she does, and he doesn’t. Maybe he does, and she doesn’t. Or maybe they just haven’t decided yet. No matter the case, it isn't anyone else's business.

I refuse to be the reason someone's scab is ripped off. Or the reason a couple is rehashing the same subject, again. Or the reason that a woman cries in despair, when she's reminded of her body's unwillingness to give her the one thing she longs for. 

So I will never, ever ask someone if they're planning to have kids, and I so hope the universe returns the favor to me. 

-AB


Our family of three is perfect. 


April 26, 2018

Rehearsal Dinner Recap


Planning our wedding was, bar none, the most rewarding experience I’ve ever had. That’s not to say it wasn’t stressful at times, but seeing months and months of hard work come to life, was the best feeling ever.

I plan to do a couple of posts about different aspects of the wedding, and I wanted to start with one of my favorite parts- the rehearsal dinner!


One of the best things about our wedding venue, is that we had it from noon on Friday to noon on Sunday. This allowed us to get everything set up Friday afternoon, and have the rehearsal dinner there Friday night. We really just wanted to be able to eat, laugh, and relax with our people before our big day, so we didn't want anything too stuffy fancy.


The room was a long rectangle, with 5 vintage cars at the end. Because we were already using the rest of the space for the wedding setup (and didn't want to have to rearrange things after dinner was over), we arranged the rehearsal dinner tables right in front of the cars. 
We used 3 eight foot rectangle tables (for about 25 people), and used the same chairs that we rented for the actual wedding. 
Set up and take down really were a breeze!



The mini cake centerpieces and place settings were my absolute favorite details!


Aren't these mini naked cakes the cutest?? Annie is AMAZING, and dreamt these up herself! We were going to do a eucalyptus garland and candles down the middle of the table, but quickly nixed that when she offered these! 



Kraft paper place cards that I made w/ my Silhouette Cameo

Somehow in the shuffle, a few of the place cards got lost. :(

I just love how everything turned out, and I hope you guys do too!
I tried to link the different things that I used, but feel free to ask questions if you have any!

-AB






April 23, 2018

Our Jamaica Vacation Started Right Here


My goodness it has been forever! A lot has happened in the last year (can't believe it's been that long since I've posted)- an engagement, and a wedding being the largest of the happenings. Now that I'm no longer a Munday though, I thought it was only right to give the blog a new name, new look, and new post. :)

I plan to do at least a post or two about the wedding, but I wanted to start with the honeymoon.We spent the last week in Jamaica, and it was an absolute blast. 

Day 1. This was not the best of our days. We got to the airport around 6:30am for our 8:00am flight, only to find out that it was to delayed to 10:00am. This delay would not allow us to make our connection in Dallas, so we were really worried that we would not get to Jamaica as scheduled. Our only option for same day arrival ending up being on a different airline, so we switched. The new flight didn't leave Tulsa until much later though, and we ended up arriving to our final destination about 6 hours after we were originally scheduled. This definitely wasn't the worst that could've happened (we really are so blessed!), but we did end up missing all of the daylight from the first day (and all of our dinner options, as we arrived after they closed).
As a small consolation, we arrived to rose petals on the bed, and Andre gave me his best George Costanza. :)


Day 2. This was a much better day. We woke up to gorgeous weather, and a really pretty view from our balcony. I don't think we did anything other than lounge on the beach that day, and it was glorious.

The resort (Luxury Bahia Principe - Runaway Bay) was SO clean. Probably because the workers were constantly power washing, mopping, painting, mowing, etc. They worked their butts off, and you could tell.

FAVORITE swimsuit. Top - Target. Bottoms - Cupshe.

Day 3. Our third day might have been the best, because this was the day we booked our couples' massage. Hands down, it was the best massage I've ever had. We didn't want to do any excursions, so this was our "splurge". Worth every penny.


Day 4. We had another good day, that was interrupted very briefly for a rainstorm. It cooled the temperature down a hair, and gave us a good opportunity for a nap. I think by this point I was on my 3rd book by the beach..


 We came during the "off season" so the resort was very calm. There were still a considerable amount of people at the pool area, but we kind of had the run of the beach. Also, the weather was perfect (about 80ish degrees with a breeze), despite the forecast showing rain every day. HIGHLY recommend this time of year for visiting Jamaica.

Day 5. Surprise, surprise, we spent another day at the beach. Our routine was very, well, routine while we were there. We woke up around 7-8, took towels down to our chairs, ate breakfast, went to the beach, ate lunch, went to the beach, rested/cleaned up, ate dinner, lounged. We also read about 7 books between the two of us, and made a handful of friends. It. Was. Perfect. 

Speaking of routine, this is what we had for lunch pretty much everyday. 

Mine- fresh salsa cold nachos (the salsa varied every day, but was super fresh and tasty always).
Not pictured, the 12 lbs. of pineapple I ate.

His - jerk chicken and chips. Not pictured, the 12 lbs. of coke he drank. ;)

The thing about all-inclusive resorts (at least our experience from the last 3) is that the food is mostly mediocre. They have to feed so many people without going bankrupt, so it's understandable for the price. We just find one or two things we love, and stick with those, maybe adding in 1-2 new things each day. 

Day 6. Our final day.. More of the same, but trying to savor each moment just a little
more.


Since we arrived to Jamaica after dark (and they have very few street lights - most of what you can see is just from the headlights of the cars zooming around you), we didn't get to see anything outside the resort until the day we left. There were some nice areas in Montego Bay, but the majority of our hour drive to the airport there was filled with views of closed businesses and rundown houses. 




Overall, we had an incredible time. We ate. We laughed. We read. We ate some more. Andre still got to watch the playoffs, and I got to nap. 
We are SO blessed to have spent the first week of marriage by ourselves, just relaxing and reflecting. If this week was any indication of the trajectory of our future, I'd say we're off to a great start.

- AB